Can
you cry under water?
How
important does a person have to be before they are considered
assassinated
instead of just murdered?
If
money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
Since
bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
Why do
you have to "put your two cents in"...but it's only a "penny for
your
thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once
you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried
in for
eternity?
Why
does a round pizza come in a square box?
What
did cured ham actually have?
How is
it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be
a good
idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is
it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like
every
two hours?
If a
deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
If you
drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?
Why
are you IN a movie, but you are ON TV?
Why do
people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars
to
look at things on the ground?
How
come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss
America?
Why do
doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you
naked
anyway.
If a
911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?
I
signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting
clothing.
If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in
the
first place!
When I
was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky
dunk."
Wouldn't
it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply
press
'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over?
Stress
is when you wake up screaming and then you realize you haven't fallen
asleep
yet.
My
husband says I never listen to him. At least I think that's what he said.
Just
remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.
Why is
it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can in
prison?
If
raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with
something
called labor!
Brain
cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.