Saturday, August 29, 2015


And, if you think lawyers don't have heart, read this lawyer story..... 

The Salvation Army realized that it had never received a donation from 
the city's most successful lawyer. 

So a volunteer paid the lawyer a visit in his lavish office. The volunteer opened 
the meeting by saying, 'Our research shows that even though your annual 
income is over two million dollars, you don't give a penny to charity.  Wouldn't 
you like to give something back to your community?  

The lawyer thinks for a minute and says, 
'First, did your research also show you that my mother is dying after a long painful 
illness, and she has huge medical bills that are far beyond her ability to pay?' 

Embarrassed, the rep mumbles, 'Uh... No, I didn't know that.' 

'Secondly,' says the lawyer, 'did it show that my brother, a disabled Veteran, is blind 
and confined to a wheelchair and is unable to support his wife and six children? 

The stricken rep begins to stammer an apology, but is cut off again. 

'Thirdly, did your research also show you that my sister's husband died in a dreadful 
car accident, leaving her penniless with a mortgage and three children, one of whom is 
disabled and another that has learning disabilities requiring an array of private tutors?' 

The humiliated rep, completely beaten, says, I'm so sorry. I had no idea. 

And the lawyer says, 'So, if I didn't give any money to them, what makes you think 
I'd give any to you?'

Thursday, August 27, 2015


1. Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? 
Try spelling Evian backwards: NAIVE 
2. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?  *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* 
3.  OK.... so if the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the 'Jags' and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known  as the 'Bucs,' what does that make the Tennessee Titans? 
4.  If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea...does that mean that one enjoys it? ! 
5.  There are three religious truths: 
a. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah. 
b. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian faith. 
c. Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at Hooters. 
6.   If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes? 
7.  If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? 
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~* 
8.   Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with? 
9  Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a race car is not called a racist? 
* *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* 
10. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one? 
11. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it  follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys   deranged,  models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners  depressed? 
12.  If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP? 
13. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks? 
14.  What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of  bald men? 
15.   I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me ... they're cramming for their final exam. 
16. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use?  toothpicks? 
17.  Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office?
What are we supposed to do, write to them?
Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail? 
18.  If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for? 
19.  You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. ! 
21.  Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't  zigzag? *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* 
22. If a cow laughed, would she spew milk out of her nose? 
23.  Whatever happened to Preparations A through G? 
24.   At income tax time, did you ever notice: When you put the two words   'The' and 'IRS' together it spells...      'THEIRS' 

Monday, August 24, 2015

Men Are Sensitive, Too!

  A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband is not 
        in bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for 
        him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup 
        of coffee in front of him.

        He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She 
        watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his 
        coffee. 'What's the matter, dear?' she whispers as she steps 
        into the room. 'Why are you down here at this time of night?'

        The husband looks up from his coffee, 'It's the 20th Anniversary 
        of the day we met.' 
        She can't believe he has remembered and starts to tear up. 
        The husband continues, 'Do you remember 20 years ago when we 
        started dating? I was 18 and you were only 16,' he says solemnly.
        Once again, the wife is touched to tears.  'Yes, I do,' she 

        The husband pauses. The words were not coming easily. 'Do you 
        remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?'  
        'Yes, I remember,' said the wife, lowering herself into the 
        chair beside him. 
        The husband continued. 'Do you remember when he shoved the 
        shotgun in my face and said, "Either you marry my daughter or I 
        will send you to prison for 20 years?"

        'I remember that, too,' she replied softly. 
        He wiped another tear from his cheek and said,
        "I would have gotten out today.'*

Thursday, August 20, 2015


You're a 19 year old kid. 
  You are critically wounded and dying in   the jungle somewhere in the Central Highlands of Viet Nam. 
It's November 11, 1967.   
LZ (landing zone) X-ray. 
Your unit is outnumbered 8-1 and the enemy fire is so   intense from 100 yards away, that your CO (commanding officer) has ordered the MedEvac helicopters to stop coming in. 
You're lying there, listening to the enemy machine guns and you know you're not getting out. 
Your family is half way around the world, 12,000 miles away, and you'll never see them again. 
As the world starts to fade in and out, you know this is the day. 
Then - over the machine gun noise - you faintly hear that sound of a helicopter. 
You look up to see a Huey coming in. But... It doesn't seem real because no MedEvac markings are on it. 
Captain Ed Freeman is coming in for you.
He's not MedEvac so it's not his job, but he heard the radio call and decided he's flying his Huey down into the machine gun fire anyway. 
Even after the MedEvacs were ordered not to come.   He's coming anyway. 
And he drops it in and sits there in the machine gun fire, as they load 3 of you at a time on board. 
Then he flies you up and out through the gunfire to the doctors and nurses and safety. 
And,   he kept coming back !! 13 more   times!! 
Until all the wounded were out. No one knew until the mission was over that the Captain had been hit 4 times in the legs and left arm. 
He took 29 of you and your buddies out that day. Some would not have made it without the Captain and his Huey. 
Medal of Honor Recipient, Captain Ed Freeman, United States Air Force, died last Wednesday at the age of 70, in   Boise, Idaho 
May God Bless and Rest His Soul. 
I bet you didn't hear about this hero's passing, but we've sure seen a whole bunch about the thug Michael Brown, Trayvon Martin, 
The gov. Shut down "what differencedoes it make!!!) 
And the bickering of congress over Health & OBAMA CARE! 
Medal of Honor Winner Captain Ed Freeman 
Shame on the media!!! 

Wednesday, August 12, 2015


This one of my newest books to be released and if you buy it before August 22, 2015 you will be in a drawing to win big prizes! Besides, I would love for you to buy this one. It is one of my favorites.

Monday, August 10, 2015


A farmer had some puppies he needed to sell. He painted a sign advertising the 4 pups and set about nailing it to a post on the edge of his yard. As he was driving the last nail into the post, he felt a tug on his overalls.
He looked down into the eyes of a little boy.
"Mister," he said, "I want to buy one of your puppies."
"Well," said the farmer, as he rubbed the sweat off the back of his neck, "These puppies come from fine parents and cost a good deal of money."
The boy dropped his head for moment.Then reaching deep into his pocket, he pulled out a handful of change and held it up to the farmer.
"I've got thirty-nine cents. Is that enough to take a look?"
"Sure," said the farmer. And with that he let out a whistle. "Here, Dolly!" he called.
Out from the doghouse and down the ramp ran Dolly followed by four little balls of fur.
The little boy pressed his face against the chain link fence. His eyes danced with delight. As the dogs made their way to the fence, the little boy  noticed something else stirring inside the doghouse.
Slowly another little ball appeared, this one noticeably smaller. Down the ramp it slid.Then in a somewhat awkward manner, the little pup began hobbling  toward the others, doing its best to catch up...
"I want that one," the little boy said, pointing to the runt. The farmer knelt down at the boy's side and said, "Son, you don't want that puppy. He  will never be able to run and play with you like these other dogs would."
With that, the little boy stepped back from the fence, reached down, and began rolling up one leg of his trousers. In doing so, he revealed a steel  brace running down both sides of his leg attaching itself to a specially made shoe.
Looking back up at the farmer, he said, "You see sir, I don't run too well myself, and he will need someone who understands."
With tears in his eyes, the farmer reached down and picked up the little pup.
Holding it carefully, he handed it to the little boy.
"How much?" asked the little boy... "No charge," answered the farmer, "There's no charge for love."
The world is full of people who need someone who understands.

Wednesday, August 5, 2015


To realize
The value of a sister/brother
Ask someone
Who doesn't have one.
To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.
To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.
To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.
To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a stillborn.
To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother
Who has given birth to
A premature baby.
To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.
To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.
To realize
The value of one second:
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident.
Time waits for no one.
Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when
You can share it with someone special.
To realize the value of a friend or family member:
The origin of this letter is unknown,
But it brings good luck to everyone who passes it on.
Hold on tight to the ones you love!